changes...

Life teaches me a lesson. To be more specific it was a lesson how little things, little changes might help you to see yourself in a very different way.
I just went to my friend’s practice as a model. Masha (my dear friend) is currently studying style and hair art. And she just did one simple thing for her first practice on human beings instead of dolls for practicing – she just made my always-so-curly-hair all straight. I’ve never ever wear my hair straight. It was always curly: more curly or less curly. I looked at myself at the mirror and see more than my new hair-do. I see a person I might be and chances I might be missing just because I don’t want to try new things and wanna stuck with my “waves” for life.

Also, before my hair experience, I did the other very new never-done-before-thing. I bought boots. Yes, you get it right – I’ve never bought boots before. Boots just never compliments my legs. I always preferred short booties or shoes. But this time I simply gave a chance to boots and tried them on. And actually they looked good on me.
I guess, life became tired to wait for me and gave a little push. And it kindda feels like it’s just a beginning of something else. I feel like it’s about time to make changes in many spheres of my life. Just feeling like it’s time to do so.
And it’s surely not because I feel ready! Oh, no. Not at all. If you know me better I’m never ready for such kind of things to do!
But I feel like whatever I want or not it’s coming. It’s naturally coming from the situation I’m in and that I gotta deal with it. I only can hope I’m strong enough to handle this stuff and learning from things that happening or about to happen with me.

For right now it feels like I have no inner resources of will power and sense, but with me it’s always this way. I do things first and wonder where I got strengths to do them. I assume it’s my way to learn myself and learn how I do things in life. And at the end of the day it’s just hope for inspiration to live next day and do my best.